the first kiss…
the first time seeing his name and number show up on your phone…
the first texts…
the first weeks…
..that's what makes the wait worth waiting for.
Like I mentioned in my last two posts about the homecoming, it all was super exciting but I hadn't yet experienced the "us" feeling. The feeling I'd feel all of the time before he'd left and while he was gone. The cloud 9, so happy, and crazy in love feeling.
It was making me super nervous and worried too because I didn't feel it when I first saw him at the airport OR the night he came to my house and we hugged and talked. The first 4 days were emotional and confusing for me because I was still waiting to experience that feeling again. While waiting for that feeling it was almost like starting a relationship from the beginning again. Having all the fun "firsts" you have in a new relationship but than you already know and are in love with that person. It was so exciting for the both of us.
On day 3 of him being home we planned to go on our first date. I had butterflies all day! That evening came and I was working up a sweat while getting ready cause I was so nervous thinking what we would be going to do and wanting to look perfect. haha. Earlier that day, when he text if he could take me out that night he said he wasn't sure what we should do and brought up going to the movies. (We have always loved going to the movies.) But throughout that day I of coarse was thinking about it and figured that wouldn't be a good first date cause we had SO MUCH catching up to do, and you can't do that during a movie! So I had to think of a different idea to tell him once he'd pick me up. So back to the story...he got to my house to pick me up and I was still trying to finish my make up so he sat down with my parents and talked to them until I was finished. It made my heart so happy. Having him back in my parents house and listening to them talk to each other and catch up. He said something while talking to them that I thought was so cute. After telling them he was there to pick me up for a date he said, "the drive here was one of the longest drives of my life." :) I finally felt content with how I look and we were off. When walking to his truck, he grabbed my hand and we held hands walking to the car. I could tell he was so nervous….and so was I. haha. Once we were in the car I told him all I really wanted to do was go somewhere that we could just talk and catch up. So he drove us to temple square. We did the Salt Lake temple square tour and it was awesome. Holding hands, walking around, laughing together. No longer being the single one seeing all the other couples. haha. :)
At the end of the tour we walked around the outside some more. We hadn't kissed yet but I knew it was coming as soon as our walk led us the the "podium" spot that over looks the temple on the east side of temple square. (as seen below)
And that is where it happened! If it was up to me, it wouldn't have happened yet because I was too nervous and not up for it. But I'm glad it did. It at least showed he wanted to and that was a good thing, after all, I was still stressing if he still felt as much in love with me since I hadn't experienced that feeling yet. haha. Yes we had our first kiss but the feeling still hadn't shown up, BUT it did sort of break the ice that still was lingering. We walked to the fountain after wards that is just east of the podium and talked some more while he hugged me and randomly would keep kissing me. haha. It was cute. It just felt good. Feeling that feeling again. During that time I'd brought up that feeling I'd been having, being nervous that coming home, he may not feel the same about me as before and to that he said, "well I'm not gonna lie, the night before coming home and before the airport, I know Satan was really trying to get to me." After that he assured that everything was okay and he loved me and kissed me again, but that sentence, just that one sentence as a reply was all the sat with me. I'm sure knowing the details of what he felt satan was making him think/feel probably wouldn't make me feel any better, but I was curious. I couldn't help it. I wanted to know what exactly it was making him think/feel that night before coming home and before getting on the plane. And after getting those feelings what he told himself in my defense. But I didn't ask. That'd be too much crazy to unleash on a first date. haha. So I kept it in..and had another night and next day of not much sleep and a loss of appetite. haha.
I will now just make the long story short because I tend to drag things out……the feeling did come. That next night. Friday night. Our second night out. He wanted to be with his family, and there was a wedding that night. So we attended with his family, than went to a late night dinner, and after that he went to drop me off at home. It was just the two of us when he went to take me home and as we pulled up to my house I just wasn't ready to have him leave. I still wanted to be with him. haha. So we talked for a few short minutes and than he leaned in to kiss me good night. I don't know what the difference was between that kiss and the kiss the night prior, but it was THAT kiss that had the those feelings rushing in. At this time, when we was going to drop me off, it was midnight. Well after that kiss, we sat in his truck and talked until 4 in the morning. It was amazing. My love was back and I was the happiest girl ever. Before leaving on his mission, I always found myself saying in my head, I'm going to marry this boy. That night sitting in his truck, talking until 4am, in my mind all I could think was, I can't believe I'm going to marry this MAN! He was the same boy I remembered two years ago, my high school sweet heart, but he'd grown up in a way I'd never known and was an even better man now.
That night was than the first night of several where I found myself just counting down for when he would propose! (;
|11-14-13: Our first date at Temple Square|
|His Homecoming, His first Sunday Home|