This is what we do when we have no money to go out and nothing good is on tv. Lol.
I will confess, that I watch our music videos we've done on a weekly basis. Muka's true colors show on all our videos. He is seriously the funniest guy I have ever met. And I flippen' Love it. ha (; Of coarse we watched them after together, but I didn't notice until I watched them after he'd left on how he looks at me during my turns to sing. Haha. It's so cute.
As you've probably been able to tell from my previous posts, that I've actually been fine since he's left. Like of coarse I miss him..but it hasn't really hit me. Ya, know?! Until yesterday/last night. Agh, it was a hard one. Lol. I don't know why, but it was. Christmas is my favorite holiday but that wasn't even that hard not having him here. But New Years Eve...Was the hardest day yet. I missed him more than ever.
It's my turn to have our voice recorder, and last night I planned to do a recording for him, to say happy new years. And in the middle of it i just started bawling. I feel bad now and I'm contemplating deleting it. Lol. But yeah. I've had a few ruff nights this week but last night was the winner.
Getting a call and seeing them on skype for the holidays is amazing...but you never think about the feeling afterwards. The "aftermath." It's pretty much like starting all over. Because you get so happy seeing them and talking..it takes you back to how it use to be..how it use to feel. Than with me, it was like a double wammy cause we talked two days in a row! Lol. So the nights after were a little hard. Going back to being just "you" on a daily basis. The long distance couple. Hah.
The first 2 nights after Christmas I cried. And both nights I felt so guilty for crying. Like I felt ungrateful for crying. Because I know I will see him again. I honestly always tell myself whenever (bad) things happen, that it can always be worse. I know that there's people out there..that will never see their spouses again. that is something to legitimately cry on a nightly basis about. I know that. I know I don't compare to that. I KNOW and AM so grateful for having him, a missionary in my life. As my boyfriend. (: And I know I'll see him again, soon! But sometimes you just get sad! Lol. I don't wanna ever come off as ungrateful or as selfish..a distraction. But those moments do occur, even to the strongest people.
ANYWAYS. Enough of that. Hah. I can't believe it's already here! 2012. It's still weird saying and writing. But it's nice to be able to say, Elder Atiga will be back next year! (: I LOVE the sound of that! haha. (:
I wish you all the happiest new year.
And hope that you had a safe and fun New Years Eve!
me nd my sisters watched the movie New Years Eve this weekend and this was a cool quote I got from it that I thought I'd share.
New Year's Eve celebrates love, hope, forgiveness, second chances and fresh starts. to stop and reflect on the year that has gone by. To remember both our triumphs and our missteps, our promises made and broken. The times we opened ourselves up to great adventures or closed ourselves down for fear of getting hurt cause that is what new years is all about- getting another chance. A chance to forgive, to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more. And stop worrying about what if and start embracing what would be. So let's remember to be nice to each other, kind to each other. And not just today, but all year long.